Granny spies.......

Surely anyone who has a Granny or who has watched "Miss Marple" could tell M15 that ladies of a certain age would make ideal spies - they never miss a trick, have eyes in the back of their heads,  take a real interest in other people and have time to chat over a cup of tea/ coffee, to fill in any gaps.

This is not to be mistaken for "gossip" or "nosiness", of course!

The helicopter overhead for the third day can now be easily explained, along with my bionic right eye.

I now need only my Ecco shoes with Velcro closing, complete with blades that protrude from the toes  (Rosa Klebb, "To Russia with Love") and stainless steel dentures, before I am assigned my first mission. 

I shall be perfectly camouflaged in the Volvo - I thought that the red, glitzy heart that had appeared on the front grid was from an admirer - I now realise it conceals the gunsights!

I shall refuse to undergo surgery to my left eye for implantation of the second bionic lens.

I didn't like the first op one bit, so there.

Today, life is still as normal, at the moment - sitting with my head bowed, awaiting the time for my next eye drops and lie down. 

Severn Trent have still not arrived, despite promises to be here first thing, having failed to appear yesterday.

They won't dare not to unblock my drains when M15 are in the picture!,